We have all experienced the bitterness of failure that we feel after missing an opportunity, failing in one of our projects, or not being able to achieve a certain goal. However, contrary to what many believe, what makes a person successful is how they deal with failure, not the absence of mistakes or unsuccessful experiences.
In reality, successful people often encounter failure, but what distinguishes them is the way they face that failure. Psychology confirms that the mental attitude and the way of handling failure experiences are what set successful people apart from others.
8 Traits That Distinguish Successful People, According to Psychology
1. Viewing Failure as a Learning Opportunity
Let’s be realistic and admit that failure is painful, encompassing feelings of embarrassment and distress, and it can shake our self-confidence. However, what distinguishes successful individuals is their refusal to succumb to these feelings and their ability not to let failure demotivate them. They accept failure as a necessary experience for achieving success. Successful people do not see failure as the end of the world but rather as a foundation for continuing to work towards their goals.
What mainly characterizes successful individuals is that they see failure as an opportunity to learn, correct mistakes, and develop themselves. Think of any successful person throughout history, and you will find that they always strive to learn from their failures and invest what they have learned to improve their performance. Thus, it is natural for this mindset to help successful individuals avoid feelings of self-pity and negative emotions, as long as they turn failure into an opportunity for constructive feedback to improve their performance.
Most people succumb to feelings of frustration when faced with failure, but successful individuals accept the experience and work to benefit from it. Inventor Thomas Edison said, “I did not fail in inventing the light bulb; I discovered a thousand ways that did not work.”
2. Viewing Failure Objectively, Not Personally
Most of us make the grave mistake of considering failed experiences as a criterion that defines our identity, attributing that failure to flaws in our character, which makes us feel embarrassed and reduces our self-confidence. Psychology confirms that successful individuals do not define their identity based on their failures; they view failure as an objective result rather than evidence of a personality defect.
Successful people recognize that failing at something does not label them as failures overall. It is very easy to fall into the trap of evaluating ourselves based on our successes or failures, but what distinguishes successful individuals is their ability not to link their results to their identity.
They believe that failed experiences do not diminish their worth and are not evidence of limited potential. They consider what happened as merely a failure encountered in their pursuit of their goals. Not achieving the desired results does not lead them to consider themselves failures. This conviction is firmly established in their minds, helping them recover from failure quickly and continue working towards their goals, regardless of the obstacles they face.
3. Taking Calculated Risks
Successful individuals are not afraid to step out of their comfort zones and take risks. They understand that failure is a potential outcome when trying new and challenging experiences, but what distinguishes them is that they take calculated risks rather than acting recklessly.
Successful individuals balance potential gains against possible losses. They research and develop precise plans before putting them into action. If they experience failure, they continue trying, knowing when to retreat and when to take risks, while maintaining a continuous focus on their larger goal.
4. Possessing a Growth Mindset
Psychologist Carol Dweck, through her important research, identified two different types of mindsets: growth and fixed. While individuals with a fixed mindset believe they cannot develop their skills and abilities and see failure as an inevitable outcome of their limited capabilities—in turn causing them to avoid challenges—those with a growth mindset believe they can develop their abilities through hard work and perseverance. This drives them to confront challenges and persist in overcoming obstacles, as they believe this approach will lead to mastery and that failure is an opportunity for learning.
Thus, one of the traits distinguishing successful individuals is their growth mindset, which enables them to deal with failure flexibly and with broad horizons. Therefore, it is not surprising that successful people do not give up when facing failure; they regard it as a necessary experience for gaining the insights that enhance their chances of success. This mindset helps successful individuals develop resilience in facing setbacks and maintain their enthusiasm for achieving their goals.
5. Not Dwelling on Past Mistakes
Mistakes are inevitable for anyone, and they are essential for personal growth, provided we possess the right mindset to address our mistakes. One of the mindsets that lead to continuous failure is overthinking our mistakes. Dwelling on past errors exacerbates feelings of regret, diminishes self-confidence, and solidifies bitterness.
Think of successful individuals, and you will find that they handle their mistakes differently; they do not overthink them or excessively chastise themselves for what they have done wrong. While successful individuals acknowledge their mistakes, they learn from them and then continue working towards their goals. They have a deep understanding that continuously thinking about past mistakes will not change what happened and will only undermine their happiness and reduce their chances of success in the present and future.
6. Being Mindful of Surrounding Themselves with Positive People
American TV host Steve Harvey said, “If you have four broke friends, you will be the fifth.” This statement holds a lot of truth; studies show that the people you spend most of your time with significantly impact your mindset and ability to achieve success. You are more likely to give up at the first sign of failure if you are surrounded by negative people who give up easily.
Successful individuals intentionally surround themselves with positive, supportive people who help boost their confidence and provide high morale. Those in your social circle encourage you when you feel discouraged, show you how much they believe in your abilities when your confidence wavers, and motivate you to continue working towards your goals when you face setbacks.
Successful individuals create a positive environment that enhances their resilience, sharpens their determination, and solidifies a positive mental attitude toward failure, all thanks to their conscious choice to stay with supportive people.
7. Practicing Self-Compassion
There is no doubt that failure is a painful experience; it shakes our self-confidence and undermines our self-esteem, making us doubt our ability to achieve our aspirations. The problem for many lies in their self-reproach and negative self-talk after failure, leading to further painful emotions and hindering their ability to recover. If you treat yourself harshly and critique yourself severely, stop, as this will only result in more disappointment, not to mention exacerbating feelings of stress.
Successful individuals avoid harsh criticism and self-reproach, instead opting for self-compassion based on the sound belief that everyone is susceptible to failure and making mistakes. They recognize the importance of self-compassion when facing failure, as it helps reinforce their self-esteem and strengthens their belief in their capabilities when they most need those positive feelings.
8. Optimism and a Positive Perspective
Optimism is a very effective trait, meaning the ability to see the positive side in the harshest circumstances and to notice the opportunities contained within every difficulty, viewing every failure as a necessary experience for achieving success. Many of the most successful individuals throughout history have stated that pessimism after experiencing failure leads to a vicious cycle of negativity, which in turn results in further failure.
Successful individuals possess an unwavering positive and optimistic outlook regardless of the circumstances. Their optimism stems from their belief in their ability to achieve success no matter the obstacles they face. This steadfast positive perspective in successful individuals leads to unwavering determination and unparalleled enthusiasm.
Successful individuals view failure as a temporary setback and believe that success is just around the corner. They can overcome setbacks without losing their passion or enthusiasm because, simply put, they are optimistic people
